UNEXPECTED STRIPTEASE

                                        A Secret Striptease

     When I arrived in Yorkshire, England the weather had turned considerably cooler, so for the first hike up the moors I decided to wear my silk long johns under my light weight slacks.

     Because of the literary history and fame of the area I was excited and was hoping to see some heather on my first moor hike. It was over 1000-feet straight up to the top of the moor.  However we zig zagged over a switchback path through pastureland and open fields during the 2-3 hour climb. The rather cool wind made me realize I’d made the right wardrobe choice in the early morning.

     At the top the wind was so strong that I thought it might actually blow over one little lady in the group. But on the other side of the moor it was much warmer and practically windless on the sunny day, so that is where we sat to eat our lunch. After lunch our guides tried to teach us some sort of a ball game popular in England.

     The hike down the moor was over a relatively smooth ‘farm road’ with a gentle decline.  Later the guide told us that most groups are taken up over the road, but they thought we were fit enough for the more rugged climb through the pastures. None of us complained!

     With the wind gone and the sun high in the cloudless sky I began to get warm and started thinking about how I was going to get those long johns off.  About half way down we stopped to visit an ancient church.  I entertained  removing those  silkies in the  crypt, but on second thought maybe not. Back up from the crypt and outside I decided the cemetery was the perfect place for a striptease!

     Sitting on a large tombstone just off the main walkway I slipped off one boot and quickly removed my leg from both  the silky and trouser leg, shoved my leg back in the trouser leg and my  foot into my boot. Then I repeated that process with the other leg. Quickly I balled up  the long johns and shoved them in my pocket,  retied my boots and was ready to move on. Quick as a flash I had performed my striptease with no one aware of what I was doing.

     Back on the road, after a bit I reached in my pocket to pull out a bit of my silkies and poked my friend in the arm saying, “Look what I’ve got.”

     Amazed she replied, “How did you do that?”

     “I'll  never tell,” I giggled.